Did you know that the average person farts about 14 times each day? I forget where exactly I learned that fact. Perhaps it was in one of the many Uncle John Bathroom Readers I've read. Lately, I have certainly been bringing up the average. Flatulence sneaks out of me quickly. Before I realize what escaped my behind, my sisters' eyes start watering. For the most part, I usually feel better after I fart. Sadly, I don't always know a fart is coming until it's too late. Occasionally, I feel farts coming I know I should not trust.
Kim informed me the other day that she can tell how bad I'm feeling by the smell of the hellish air puffs that come out of my anus. According to her assessment, I'm still not feeling very well. I was impressed because her assessment was correct. It's uncomfortable to hold them in...It builds pressure in my stomach and gives me the feeling I'm going to shit myself. I don't hold them in around family or close friends. When I'm in class, that's the most difficult time to hold them in. I'm not always successful. It would be embarrassing, but honestly there are so many people in the class no one would be able to pin point the fart on me. Thankfully, mine are silent, which may explain the deadly part of it. I've come close to knocking my sisters off their feet. I know I've made them cry more than once.
