I can't place which brand this phrase belongs to, but I remember "Have a happy period" being a catch phrase, marketing campaign for a feminine product brand. Are you bloody kidding me? Should the words 'happy' and 'period' even be in the same sentence? Can you tell I'm hormonal? Why must women of a childbearing age bleed out every month? Is it really necessary for responsible women using protection, taking a pill, and/or abstaining from sex to endure this madness every month. In my experience, there is nothing happy about it other than the fact that it signifies I'm not pregnant. Okay, so I guess it's better than the alternative (being pregnant or being old), but I don't see this clown nose red blood oozing out of me as a beautiful gift of womanhood.
My first period didn't make an appearance until I was fifteen. And even then it only came around every few months. It first started right around the time I was beginning to figure out and get a handle on Crohn's after being diagnosed. I can probably count on my two hands the amount of periods I had in high school, which isn't many. The age when my sisters and friends were developing curves, starting their periods, and gaining interest in relationships, I was waiting for boobs to grow on my skeleton, wondering what it would be like to have a period (down right awful I would later learn), and being too engrossed in my bowel habits to be interested in relationships. Eventually, my boobs finally grew to an A, my period became regular after I graduated high school, and I'm still waiting for my interest in relationships to spike. I think the onset of Crohn's during my formative years stunned my sexual development to some extent... I'll save that topic for another post in the future.
Typically, my periods are three-four days long and are accompanied with back and stomach pain. I can handle cramps, but the pain I get is unbelievable most times. The hormones cause mood swings. Birth control pills didn't help the pain or mood swings for me like everyone claims they should have, so I stopped taking them. I'm convinced that my period makes my Crohn's symptoms worse. More pain and more irregular bowel movements around my period. How can my period cause both extreme diarrhea and extreme constipation, depending on the month? Plus, the whole let me bleed for three days a month and act like everything is okay has to be the biggest joke females tell themselves. Keep in mind while I'm bleeding I usually have anal leakage to deal with too, so I'm just one big, disgusting mess. I know I don't have heavy flow compared to most, but just the fact that blood flows out of me for days in a row doesn't make me happy. It's bad enough when I have blood in my stool. Am I over-reacting? Most likely. It doesn't change the fact I want to take out my womanhood, tie my tubes... I don't care I just want to be a woman without the red hood. I would be happier without a period. Perhaps I should get pregnant. I'm sarcastic about getting pregnant because that would solve my issue for nine months only to have a different issue for eighteen years. On the other hand, I'm sure getting pregnant would make my boobs bigger. Though the trade off just isn't worth it to me.
