That Bitch, Irma

By the time I got back into town after Labor Day weekend and went to the store to see what I could get to prepare for that bitch, Irma, the selves where the non-perishables belonged were already empty. One of the few benefits of living with my parents is that they prepared well enough for the hurricane so that all I had to do was basically just show up at their house for shelter. I know it's not very adult of me, but my preparations only included:

• Helping board up my parents house
• Parking my car at my uncle's warehouse
• Packing my duffle in case shit got real
• Charging my phone and back up batteries
• Charging my electric toothbrush
• Putting batteries in flashlights
• Buying bread, green beans, and chips

I probably should have been more concerned than I was, but I did not allow everyone else's stress and worry get to me before the storm. We lost power around 8PM Sunday, September 10th, so we were without power and A/C early on. It didn't take long for the house to get fucking hot!  By 9PM, I was asleep on the tile floor in the kitchen with my pillow, sleep mask, and Beat headphones blaring music. The tile was the coolest spot inside and I couldn't hear the storm with my headphones on. I woke up briefly abound 5:30AM and moved to my bed for about two hours until the heat was too much to bare.  So yeah, I slept through hurricane Irma.

It was still very windy Monday morning, but I helped clean the yard and move debris to the road. Although the neighborhood lost a lot of trees, the houses didn't have any major damage. The lake was up to the fence in the backyard and all of the docks were under water. As soon as our county lifted the curfew at 6PM on Monday, I went to my uncle's warehouse to get my car. We had gotten a generator and everyone claimed a spot in front of the fan without any room for me, so I slept on a patio chair on the porch with the noise of our neighbor's generator on one side and the noise of our generator on the other. Again, I used my sleep mask, and beat headphones to get to REM. 

Tuesday morning I went over to my uncle's house to help him clean up his yard and the mess that was left behind after his sun room roof blew off.  I went into work at 2PM and left around 5PM. At home, we had more fans plugged into the generator on Tuesday night! It was still too fucking hot to get comfortable though and I found myself sleeping on the porch for the second night in a row with the annoying generators.

Irma taught me that I am higher to maintain than I realized.  I need air conditioning! Please, spare me the whole "it could have been worse speech". Plus, it's difficult to get ready in the dark with a flashlight and cold showers are not my cup of tea. I wasn't stressed before the storm, but I was certainly stressed and uncomfortable after the storm. My bowels were proof with irregular BM's and some stomach pain. Thankfully, running friends with power offered to let me stay with them!  I ended up staying two nights (Wednesday and Thursday) with Badass Doreen and her family. Her kindness is overwhelmingly amazing and I owe her big time! It was great getting to know her and her family better.

I went back home after work on Friday because our power came on. Things are slowing getting back to normal...whatever that is. 

Taylor's Bridal Shower

This past weekend was a whirlwind. Friday was a half-day Friday at Work, but work is insanely crazy, so I left later than I had planned. If I could have, I would have worked the whole day on Friday and even on Saturday. It sucks heading to South Florida from Sanford because it adds about 45 minutes to my drive time than if I were to leave from Orlando instead. It took me right at four hours to make it down there. During my drive down, I couldn't get a few contracts out of my head because I left things in a bit of chaos.

I pretty much missed Taylor's dress fitting. I got there just time before they left the location of the fitting. Between thinking it started later than it did and leaving late from work, it was pretty much doomed from the start. Before dinner we had to go to the hotel so that I could bring the ice chest with the bridal shower cake in it to the room, which I presumably managed to keep Taylor from seeing it (I'm not completely convinced she didn't sneak a peek because she lost interest in seeing it relatively quickly). The girls unpacked all of the bridal shower stuff Taylor left with me in Orlando to bring. My car is definitely not made for moving a bunch of shit from one place to another.

We had a nice dinner at Olive Garden and Taylor made my day better by buying me two beers! After dinner, I felt much more relaxed and not as stressed. Once we got the flowers for the bridal shower and were back at the hotel, we got in our comfy clothes and started getting to work on decorations, favors, and such. Cybelle brought super fun face masks for our skin that we used right before we went to bed.

My alarm went off on Saturday for me to wake up early and go for a run, but I decided to snooze and skip running since I had a long weekend ahead of me. We got to the venue about two hours early to begin setting up. Somehow everything fell into place just in time. I don't think the cake could have been more perfect! The shower was elegant, lovely, and fun; however, personally, the work that went into it was not very rewarding to me. I know in the end it doesn't matter what I think because it wasn't about me, ultimately it was to celebrate and honor the bride-to-be. Hey, she seemed pleased with the bridal shower, so I'd count that as a success! I'm glad that's behind us. These wedding things are just not my cup of tea.

I left South Florida to head home around 3PM on Saturday. Thankfully, I was home by 6:30PM. I procrastinated on going to bed and when I finally did, I couldn't get to sleep for the life of me.  It was around 10PM when I finally fell asleep. Only to have my alarm go off at 1:30AM on Sunday so that I could go to my volunteer shift at the Disney Princess Half Marathon.

To be continued...

Waking Up Before 4AM

By now I'm sure you know that I run with MarathonFest three times a week. On Tuesdays and Thursdays, my alarm goes off at 3:45AM. On Saturdays, my alarm goes off anywhere between 3:15AM and 4:15AM depending on how far we're running that weekend and what time my group is starting. I've been averaging about five to six hours of sleep on nights before my runs. Recently, I was asked how I do it. How do I wake up that early three times a week to run?

There are a couple of factors contributing to my success at waking up so gosh darn early. First, I believe that being in good health is a huge factor. I do not feel fatigued every hour of every day like I used to. I actually feel rested even after only five hours of sleep. Believe it or not, I've only been napping after my long runs on Saturday, and the occasional (maybe once every few weeks) cat nap during my lunch break to keep me fresh for the rest of the day.  My increased energy and the fact that I feel amazing makes it relatively easy to wake up.   Second, I think the fact that it's been easy for me to jump right out of bed when my alarm goes off at an ungodly hour has a lot to do with how motivated I am to train my best for the NYC Marathon. I don't know if I've ever been more determined to succeed. Sometimes I even wake up before my alarm... that's how excited I am to get to train for NYC!

Whether or not I will wake up when my alarm goes off has not been a question. The decision was made when I won the lottery drawing to get into the NYC Marathon.  Don't bother asking me if I'm running... the answer is YES!  Not counting my surgery and slight recovery in April, I have only missed two training runs and that was due to period cramps. I got a little behind on my long run distance during the couple of the bad runs I had in the unrelenting Florida heat, but I am officially back on track.

When my alarm goes off, I wake up. I don't hit snooze or lay in bed convincing myself to get up. I don't need to be convinced because I understand that getting out of bed so early to run is a good way to train for the race of my life.  So far, I haven't regretted waking up early to run. It's always fun to tell my co-workers that I ran five miles before work or to tell them how far I ran over the weekend.

I Take Naps in My Dreams

I thought I got all of my credit card shenanigans straightened out. Thankfully, I remembered my dream last night, which triggered a thought. In the dream, my sisters, a few friends, and I were on vacation in NYC. Apparently, I take naps in my dreams. Anyways, when I woke up this morning, I was lost for second because I thought I was taking a nap in a hotel room in NYC, not in my bedroom in Florida. It made me think about my dream, NYC, and the NYC Marathon. That's when I started to freak out. I remembered that I forgot to change my billing information on the New York Road Runners website where the marathon lottery takes place. The drawing isn't until March 8th. so I did have some time... but it was a close call for someone with a memory as bad as mine. If I didn't update my billing info with a valid credit card and I won the lottery into the NYC Marathon on March 8th, I would have forfeited my entry because I didn't have a valid payment method on file.

I'm all set now! Honestly, I don't know if I'm more nervous about my interview on Thursday or the lottery drawing next Tuesday. All the while, I should probably be more concerned about taking naps in my dreams.

Falling Baby Dolls

I walked 2.5 miles with my Team Challenge peeps this morning for the Turkey Trot. We kept a 17 minute pace, which felt like a super fast walk to me. Kim even went with me to "evaluate" if I should be doing the half marathon tomorrow.  I was surprised how well I felt. I didn't struggle to breathe and my legs felt stronger than I expected. Kim and my Team Challenge peeps agree that I should at least walk the half marathon tomorrow since there is a 7 hour time limit for the course. This makes me happy because after picking up my race packet yesterday, the pre-race excitement is running through my veins.

Of course, there's a catch. I'm constipated. I haven't pooped since Wednesday. I took laxatives on Thursday and Friday, but I still haven't pooped. I won't be taking any laxatives today because I don't want them to start working during the race. I just hope my stomach feels okay tomorrow. Two weeks ago I was pooping about every hour and now I can't even poop. This disease makes no sense. My bowel habits are almost always on my mind.

In other news, I remembered the dream I had last night. As much as I sleep I rarely remember my dreams, so this is exciting for me. Tons of naked baby dolls were falling from the ceiling and whoever collected the most in a minute won. I never saw anyone else trying to collect the baby dolls in my dream though. It was just me running around picking up as many naked dolls as I could. It hurt when the falling dolls fell on my head, so I was trying to avoid the falling dolls in the process. It was the longest minute ever... Super strange.

My Stomach is on the Fritz

Since Friday evening I've slept for just about 24 hours. I was only up for a few hours yesterday. My first nap I took with three blankets on top of me and I didn't even break a sweat. At first I was freezing and then I was comfortable. My second nap wasn't planned. I started watching an episode of the Walking Dead and the next thing I know I was waking up three hours later.

I don't feel well. I could blame eating healthy. I could blame my period. I could blame the liquid multivitamin. I could blame the vitamin D. I could blame the vitamin C.  I'm not blaming those things though. I am blaming the iron pills. I am taking iron for myself because I believe, in time, they will help me feel better. They better make me feel better because right now I feel like shit.  My stomach has been on the fritz. It's been hurting. I can't trust farts. I've been having very explosive bowel movements. I've barely been able to get the bathroom fast enough. I'm experiencing down right nasty diarrhea. Some of my stool is black and some of it appears green... it's a side effect of the iron.

Can I just take one long nap and wake up feeling well?

Something's Gotta Give

Last Wednesday, I was overcome with nasty fatigue. I thought maybe it was because I used too many spoons at a pub crawl with work on Tuesday night. However, the fatigue has stuck around like an annoying zit that isn't welcome. Times like these make me glad that I'm not responsible for anyone except myself. I don't even feel like taking care of myself because it feels like a lot of work.

If I'm being honest about it, I probably noticed becoming more easily fatigued a month or so ago. Then I started running a couple of weeks ago.  It's hard. I'm slow as fuck. I find myself gasping for air and my legs screaming at me to stop... to which I tell them to shut up. After a one or two mile run, I feel like I've ran a marathon. I can say that because I know how that feels. I'm exhausted. It doesn't feel right. I totally understand that getting back into shape is hard, but I don't think it's supposed to be this difficult. I'm supposed to be athletic for crying out loud.  I have such little energy that taking a shower tires me out.

When people ask how I am, I tell them I'm doing great. For the most part it's true and I want it to be true, but it's not completely true. Fatigue is part of the invisible side of Crohn's.  I look normal and healthy, but really I'm struggling with energy.  Can't someone pay me to just sleep and poop?

I finished a 5k on Saturday and it was ugly... 40 minutes of ugliness. Typically, I would say 5k's are easy, but not anymore. 5k's deserve more respect than I previously gave them. I woke up, ran and mostly walked the 5k, went home, took a shower, and then slept until dinner. I ate dinner and then went back to bed. From Friday at 7:30pm until Sunday at 7:30pm I slept over 30 hours. The crazy thing is that I'm still tired.

Why am I so tired? Is this just typical for being out of shape? Heck, I've ran a half marathon without training before and it wasn't this hard. The last part of last week I went to work and then came home, ate dinner, took a shower, and went to bed just to do it all over again the next morning. Something's gotta give... I want to feel strong again. I want to feel like a runner again. I want the slight pain in my belly after a bowel movement to go away, so I can stop ignoring it. Ahh, is that pain I feel... no, I don't think so... you're just a wimp. I don't feel any pain. No, really though...was it pain? Maybe I'm just being paranoid about another flare looming.

A Whole Weekend Off

This weekend off was exactly what I needed. Sure, I didn't fill out as many job apps as I would have liked to, but I think I owed myself one weekend of a little laziness. Plus, I felt sick all of last week with a sore throat, runny nose, and pounding headaches. I cleaned my room, did laundry, searched for jobs, dyed my hair, lounged by the pool, tried on my rocking hot outfit for the wedding next weekend and took three hour naps!  It was grand!!!

Seriously, I think I could sleep forever. No matter how long my nap is or how many hours of sleep I get at night I never have a problem falling asleep. I never think I'm not tired enough to sleep. Friday and Saturday night I got about 12 hours of sleep each night. I didn't set an alarm to wake up, I just decided to stay awake when I woke to pee out of obligation to have a somewhat productive day. I took a three hour nap this afternoon from about 4pm to 7pm and here it is almost 9pm and I'm ready for bed.

For the most part, Crohn's disease has been behaving itself. Although I did experience some slight stomach pain last week, but that easily could have been from Aunt Flow. It's been so nice not having to deal with pain. I actually think my pain tolerance has gone down since I'm not used to handling it every day. No pain is good, but I hate how it makes me feel weak when I do encounter pain because I'm not accustomed to it like I was.

Even though I haven't been experiencing pain, Crohn's is still present. I know because I pooped about nine times yesterday and last week I was pooping about five times a day. At first, I blamed my period; however, when it continued I started to blame Crohn's. What the heck, how can I poop nine times in a day and think it's okay? Because I feel okay that's how. It does worry me a little though. If it keeps up, I know I'll start losing weight again and that's never fun. I'm a solid 140 lbs, not the 150 lbs I've been trying to get back to since the beginning of the year, but I'll take it.

Can't Get Enough...Sleep

I've been averaging 9 hours of sleep each night during the week. Friday and Saturday nights I've been getting about 12 to 15 hours of sleep each night. That's not including napping hours. It seems that I can't get enough sleep. Do you know that feeling of not being able to fall asleep because you're too rested? Lately, I don't have any trouble falling asleep unless stomach pain makes it difficult.  I wake up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom, but sometimes I think it's like a sleep walk, sleep poop kind of thing. I don't struggle to get back to sleep. When I take a nap, I have to set an alarm to wake me up, or else I risk not waking up until the morning. Just yesterday afternoon, I was studying on the couch for my exam on Tuesday and the next thing I know I'm waking up around 9pm thanks to some noisy kids upstairs. I fell asleep. I don't even remember thinking that I was tired. I lost about 5 hours of study time because I unintentionally fell asleep. I stayed awake long enough to move from the couch to my bed. It wasn't until this morning that I realized I was hungry because I wasn't awake to eat dinner last night. I love sleeping, but it makes it hard to live a productive life when all  I ever want to do is sleep.  Am I depressed? I don't think so. Am I sick? It seems I'm almost always sick in some way. Am I tired? I'm so tired that even my tired is tired.