Truth Bomb

I saw this quote on Facebook: "You're Always One Decision Away from a Totally Different Life." How is that for a truth bomb? We all could make a decision or multiple decisions that would change our lives respectfully!  Whoa!!! 

In 2017, I want to dream bigger! I need to sit down and ponder what I want out of life when I'm not just surviving, and then I need to (*gasp*) plan how I will achieve these so called bigger goals! A lot of people around me are changing their lives by going to school, moving, having babies, or getting married. Whereas I was thinking along the lines of flossing and eating healthier on a regular basis. Although I'm not currently ready for a drastically different life, I want to plan so that one day I will be. One day, my teeth, gums, and waist line will thank me. 

The Best of 2016

I know there's a lot of hate going around the internet towards 2016.  However, 2016 was a phenomenal year for me for the most part!

• I was promoted at work.
• I entered and won a lottery entry into the NYC Marathon on my first try.
• I made new friends at work.
• I started new medicine (Remicade).
• I felt the best I've felt in over a decade! I got my life back!
• I had awesome bowel movements.
• I joined a running group.
• I made great running friends.
• I trained for a marathon and regularly woke up at 4am or earlier three days a week to run.
• I joined a gym.
• I saw Halsey live in concert.
• My best friend got engaged!
• I said yes to be my best friend's Maid of Honor!
• I socialized and stepped outside of my comfort zone.
• I went to NYC on vacation with my best friend!
• I ran the NYC Marathon!
• I ran an awesome half at OUC!
• I ran my first relay and my first trail run at Ragnar!
• I camped for real!
• My sister graduated from UCF!
• I got an electric keyboard to learn how to play.

This Christmas was NOT Normal

My Uncle Don went to the hospital on Thursday. He was diagnosed with pneumonia and sepsis and has been sedated since Friday. He's been in ICU and was given a 50/50 chance. On Christmas the doctors were uncertain if it had in fact been pneumonia or if it was RSV. The non-answers and wishy-washiness gives me dejavu from when my Grandpa Ace was in the hospital. Are doctors really that clueless? I'm uncertain what changed today, but he was updated to critical, but guarded.  While others have been visiting him in the hospital, I have not. There are a lot of contagious things, especially in ICU and I do not want to expose my immune system. My Grandma Ace came down with a cough today, which is how my Uncle's health issues started (Don lives with Grandma Ace), so now I can't even visit my Grandma. I think my dad is going to take her to the doctor in the morning to make sure it's nothing more than a common cold. It really is a messy situation and it has been understandably hard on my Grandma Ace. I feel helpless, but as selfish as it is I cannot risk my good health.

Since I got off work early on Friday, I stopped by my Grandma Ace's house to visit her and see how she was doing. Strangely enough, I woke up barfing Friday Night into Saturday morning. Now, it could be totally unrelated to the health of my Uncle and now my Grandma's possible health issues, but it freaked me out. I felt so bad that I completely skipped my run that I was supposed to lead. I didn't bring my phone with me when I moved to the couch to sleep after barfing the first time. When I woke up, I had lots of missed calls and messages from my running group. Not only did I feel terrible from vomiting and being sick to my stomach (I'm not pregnant), I also felt terrible for missing the run and leaving everyone out of the loop. My group was understanding and my ugly stepsister proved to be a great friend by calling and messaging to check up on me throughout the day on Saturday and Sunday. It's great when new friends genuinely care about you.

Thankfully, I am feeling better and my Uncle Don is stilling hanging on! This Christmas was anything but normal. We are hopeful that Uncle Don will keep improving slowly.

"I Don't Care About the Presents Underneath the Christmas Tree"

To quote Mariah Carey: "I Don't Care About the Presents Underneath [the my] Christmas Tree."

I had a very humbling experience volunteering at XL106.7's Baby DJ program with my Ugly Stepsister and her Sprint team last night.  Baby DJ collects toys for kids, and then invites people unable to provide Christmas for their families to come to the toy warehouse to "shop" for free toys for their children. The parents are allowed to pick up to three toys per child. We helped over 700 children last night alone in our community!   It really made me count my blessings and I plan to volunteer again next year.

Begin rant:
Now that I'm an adult, my days in believing in Santa are long behind me. I don't have a Christmas list, nor do I expect anything for Christmas. Let's be honest...If I want something, I'll buy it for myself. (i.e. an electric keyboard).  For me, Christmas tends to be about the obligation of buying presents and it bothers me because that is not what I want Christmas to be about. I feel a little guilty for feeling obligated to buy gifts for others. After all, 'tis the season for giving. However, I'd rather donate my time and spend my money on those less fortunate than my family and friends. Except for a couple of people (3), I don't feel good about getting family and friends gifts because most of the time it just feels like something I have to do since they get me presents. I'm giving a lot of fucking gift cards this year because I'm just not into it. (is it wrong that my heart just isn't into it?) It's different if I get something that I think someone will love and don't expect anything in return (umm...isn't that the kind of giving we should be doing?) I want Christmas to be about enjoying time with friends and family and sending good wishes to those away from home with a card or a phone call. I want Christmas to be about helping those less fortunate than me. It's too late to save my Christmas, but I am going to make sure next Christmas will be the Christmas I want, which means having a lot of difficult conversations with people who will likely be disappointed. There's more to life, there's more to Christmas than gifts!
End rant!

Proud Big Sister

Kim graduated Cum Laude from UCF this weekend with her BS degree in Sport and Exercise Science with a specialization in Human Performance (or something like that).  She has worked hard to get where she is at and I couldn't be happier for her. Not only has she overcome self doubt academically, but she has also narrowed in on her ambition to become a physical therapist.  While in the midst of finals she went to two doctor of physical therapy interviews. I can only image how stressful the last few weeks have been for her. She is still waiting to hear from more schools she applied to, but a huge weight has been lifted from her shoulders because she was accepted into the Murphy Deming College of Health Sciences Doctor of Physical Therapy program (this is the first DPT program she interviewed with). Murphy Deming is in Virginia, so we are anticipating her to move by the time the program starts in June.

I am beyond thrilled for her to be realizing her dreams, but I cried because I will miss her when she moves away. Out of all of my sisters, I am closest with Kim. We get each other, we are the only ones in our family that understand the whole college experience (we make it look easy, but we know it isn't), we tell each other truths that are difficult to hear, and we support each other no matter what. It's no secret that Kim is my favorite sister even though Kim and Kelly are like the ultimate twin bestfriends.  I wish my relationship with my twin could be like theirs; however that bridge is not ready to be rebuilt. I have a feeling in Kim's absence I will grow closer to Kelly. I've even joked with Kim and Kelly that I'm going to be Kelly's new bff when Kim moves away. We laugh because we all know that won't happen.

DPT school is a three year program, so by 2020 Kim will be a Physical Therapist. At the moment, I would seriously consider moving to wherever she takes her first PT job.

Run, Camp, Sleep, and Repeat

The Alafia Ragnar Trail Relay was a super fun experience that took me completely out of my comfort zone. First of all, if I wasn't as healthy as I am right now, camping with Crohn's disease would have seriously freaked me out. Thankfully, I am not dealing with any symptoms, so it wasn't an issue. Secondly, even though I was camping with strangers (now I consider them new friends) and sharing a tent with a guy I only met a couple of weeks ago, my social anxiety was nonexistent because I felt welcomed and a part of the team, aka, Sloth Squad!  Lastly, I had never done trail running before and this past weekend I did an extremely difficult mountain bike trail with cliffs, hills that seemed like mountains, and hairpin turns (it felt like I was running in another state) and I even ran a trail at night...in the dark with a head light!  It was an amazing whirlwind of an adventure.

Unfortunately, I am not very good at trail running. I fell a total of four times and bruised my knees like a kid on the playground. I sprained my ankle on my first trail run. Somehow I managed to push through the pain and finish strong. I went straight to the first aid tent and had the medic tape my ankle tightly to limit its range of motion and offer support so that I could continue the relay. We had a onesie party at camp, porta potties became a way of life, and we became a part of the Ragnarian family!

I carpooled to the relay with two people on my team, The Sloth Squad. We left early on Saturday after we were finished with our legs of the race because we had to get back to Orlando while the rest of our team finished their last legs of the relay. Our team captain picked up our medals when they were done and I'm excited to get it from him Tuesday night at Ten10 Run Club.

I had to get back to Orlando to attend my company's holiday party. It was kind of a rush to get cleaned up from camping and running in order to be presentable at the semi formal event. I'm really glad my sister, Kelly, went with me as my plus one. We enjoyed the cocktail hour before the grand ballroom opened at the Orlando World Center Marriott. I introduced Kelly to co-workers, most of which were executive managers because that's who I work closest with. She got to meet George Smith, the co-founder of the company, which was neat. The International/Entertainment VP told Kelly and Mr. Smith about the Owner Contracts I'm working on for him. The party had a live band, a dance floor, a delicious buffet, and an open bar. I lost count of how many jack and cokes I enjoyed. I had an interesting conversation with our W/WW (water/wastewater) VP about running and triathlons. We are both typically quiet, but the alcohol made chatting more natural for both of us. lol. My supervisor even gossiped about office drama. I stayed seated for most of the night because my ankle was swollen and it hurt to walk, so walked with a limp. By the end of the night, I went to dance with a lady who asked me to go on the dance floor earlier. She danced all night long with her husband and others and was constantly pulling folks up on the dance floor with her. She introduced me to a guy on the dance floor and we danced together for a couple of songs. He twirled me!!! Seriously, I was twirled and I wasn't sure I was twirling correctly, but it was fun! I likely wasn't very graceful with my bum ankle though... not that I would have been more graceful without a bum ankle. Afterwards, Kelly said "Well, he was hot!".

The last few days have been a blast with very little sleep, which means it's time for a nap!

Runner's High

I'm going to just jump right into this post. I ran the Space Coast Half Marathon on Sunday, November 27th in 2:28: 06. It was a good race with three ladies from my MarathonFest group. It's never fun to race while I'm on my period, but I made the most of it. No real cramps; however, around mile 9 I started to slow down because I wasn't feeling well.  I finished a few minutes after the other ladies in my group and caught up with them for a picture after the race. We enjoyed some post race chocolate milk and soon afterwards I found myself in a porta-potty barfing the chocolate milk and perhaps even dinner the night before. The girls were great. One of them gave me a baby wipe so that I could clean up a bit, and then they walked with me to get some water. I cut the post race party sort because I wasn't feeling well. I wanted to wait for Kim to cheer her on at the finish line, but instead I texted her to tell her that I got sick and I would wait for her in the car. I was really happy with a sub 2:30 half marathon! I'm really happy to see my hard work of training for the last several months paying off.

Less than a week after the Space Coast Half, I ran the OUC Half Marathon on Saturday, December 3rd.  I met a few people from my running group for a group photo before the race. Almost everyone split off and did their own thing except for Michelle (my Ugly Stepsister), Sara, and I. Sara stayed with Michelle and I until mile 6, and then she let us take off. She did catch us briefly while I was enjoying my second cup of beer along the course right before mile 10, but again she told us to go ahead. I was actually the one pacing us most of the race. Even though we talked about how we were feeling every mile or so to see if we needed to adjust the pace, we both agreed to keep pushing. We posted a 10 minute mile during the seventh mile of the race. After that, I tried to make an effort to slow down a little. Michelle makes running fun by talking nonstop, telling stories, telling jokes, and getting to know the runners around us. She forgot her salt tablets and I knew when she got quiet around mile 10.5 that she wasn't at 100%. She didn't say she was struggling and I kept a steady pace even though there were times I had to look back to make sure I didn't lose her. Once we turned the final corner and had the finish line in sight, she said "Go, Lauren, go!" I knew that was her telling me to take off and sprint towards the finish line. I finished in 2:24:55!!! Another sub 2:30 half! Plus, it was over 3 minutes faster than the Space Coast Half the week before. Michelle didn't finish too far behind me. I went to give her a high five right after she crossed the finish line and she opened her arms and gave me the biggest hug. She thanked me for pushing her and said that if it wasn't for me she wouldn't have been able to post the time she did. Afterwards, she told me that she was cramping up (salt tablets help prevent her cramps), but didn't want to say anything because she didn't want to slow me down. 

OUC was a great test run since we plan to run the Disney Marathon together. Racing is always different from training runs, so it was good to race together and see if we want to change our strategy.  I have mad respect for the way she pushed through the discomfort and finished strong.  We agreed that our pace will be intentionally slower at Disney. I'm thankful to have someone to run with that pushes me as much as I push her. Since we are part of a Track Shack training program, we had VIP access, which included fancy porta-potties, and an area with food, tables and chairs.We met up with Sandra from our group and we enjoyed the sandwiches and cookies in the VIP area. I met Michelle's wife, son, and brother. It was great to finally meet her wife whose brother is struggling with Crohn's. We chatted about his current situation and medication and I gave what advice I could knowing that everyone's disease is different. She thinks that I represent the hope of the good days that are ahead for him, and I pray he finds relief from the horrible symptoms of Crohn's disease. He is also a runner and I completely understand the separate pain that can come from not being able to do what you love.  Although I'm beyond grateful for my health, I can't help but have a sense of survival guilt. I am not taking these healthy days for granted.

Ragnar Trail Relay is up next!