My new gastro as well as my new surgeon ordered me to stop Remicade to allow time for the Remicade levels to decrease in my body before surgery. The reason for stopping it is because Remicade weakens my immune system and the doctors said it would slow down the healing process. I was supposed to have my next Remicade infusion on October 31, 2017. Even though I won't likely experience a literal withdraw from missing my regularly scheduled dose, I'm freaking out a little. They have taken away the one thing that helped me have pain free days, formed stool, control of my bottom end pipes, and regular bowel movements. Imagine my concern over the fact that I will not be getting my medicine and my stomach and bowel movements have not gotten back to how they were before my colonoscopy last week. The drug was designed to intentionally weaken my immune system because my immune system is fucked up when left alone. Without Remicade, I'm worried my immune system will fuck up the current state of my health before surgery.
No matter how poorly surgery goes or how many complications I experience due to surgery, I don't think I will regret the decision to have surgery. How could I allow myself to regret the only solution that was presented to me by multiple doctors? The choice I may regret would be the decision to stop Remicade at my new doctors' request. I could make one phone call tomorrow and go back to my old gastro. His nurse would give me Remicade in heartbeat. I would like to maintain my current health for four more weeks, which would just about get me to surgery day. I would also like my body not to build antibodies towards Remicade while I'm off the medication.
Remicade, it's not you, it's my doctors. You gave me better health than I experienced in over a decade. Apparently, we need some time apart though. Thank you for the amazing days you gave me! I really hope you'll wait for me until after surgery because I don't want to say goodbye forever. I just have to say goodbye right now.
