I have not been looking forward to writing this post. I kept postponing it in the hopes symptoms would cease. Crohn's is back! There we go, I said it. While my doctors never said I was in remission, I was doing extremely well and it certainly felt like Crohn's was in remission. For the past few weeks, I've been experiencing blood and mucus in my stool along with going to the bathroom more frequently. Occasional pain, but thankfully the pain has been manageable. Fatigue is showing its ugly head. Tiredness is haunting me. Running is hard.
The scariest part for me are the new symptoms I am also experiencing. I've been passing fecal matter in my urine and passing gas through my urethra. SOMETHING IS NOT RIGHT!!! What if the good days are over? I am going to be astonished if this does not require surgery.
I saw my colorectal specialist on Friday. Although I didn't get any answers, we did make a plan. I'm going to be scheduling a colonoscopy with my gastro so that we can take a better look at the active disease and then use the findings to discuss and re-evaluate medication options. I'm also going to be scheduling a barium enema with my colorectal specialist where we will use the contrast in the barium to see the structure of my large intestine on x-rays where we're looking for abnormalities like fistulas leading into my urethra.
A lot of my running friends have science backgrounds, so it's nice to get input from them. I have been very open about Crohn's with my new friends, which is liberating and terrifying at the same time. My friends, new and old, have been amazingly supportive and understanding. I am beyond grateful for the people in my life that care about me and motivate me to seek answers. A newer friend offered to go with me to appointments and I think I'm going to take her up on it once I schedule my colonoscopy and barium enema. Someone thought I had lost 15 lbs. in the past two weeks. Even though I haven't been weighing myself regularly, I think I've only lost 5 - 7 lbs. and I don't think it's that obvious I have lost weight.
I'll keep you posted...
Showing posts with label weight loss. Show all posts
Showing posts with label weight loss. Show all posts
Sunday, July 2, 2017
Thursday, January 8, 2015
The Texas Incident
... Continued
Once I began vomiting in the early morning on Saturday, December 27th my stomach kept telling me I had to poop every hour, but I could not find relief. I sat on the toilet and vomited in the trash can. That's how I spent most of the day on Saturday when I wasn't lying in bed with a heat pad on my belly. Veronica convinced me to call my parents and tell them what was going on. I didn't want to freak them out, so I tried to down play how horrible I really felt. My mom immediately offered to drive to come pick me up, but I thought I could wait it out and be better by my flight Monday morning. I was wrong!
Saturday night came around and the vomiting had stopped, but I still couldn't poop. I decided to take three pills of Veronica's mom's laxatives in hopes that my belly could find some relief. Sunday morning around 7am I began vomiting again. At this point, I hadn't eaten anything since Friday night, so it was just liquid coming up. I didn't sleep for more than an hour at a time before my body was waking me up because it thought I had to go to the bathroom, but I couldn't get anything out. Around 9am on Sunday I was finally able to poop. At first, beautiful turds filled the toilet; however, each time I went running to the bathroom my bowel movements became looser and looser until I could no longer control them. I pooped my pants twice because I couldn't make it to the bathroom fast enough. I wasn't even embarrassed. Just disappointed with my body. I called my parents at 11:45am Texas time to ask my mom to come get me because I knew I couldn't fly on a plane while having uncontrollable diarrhea and vomiting my brains out.
My mom and Kim left to come get me and I tried to gain some control of my pipes. I spent most of the day sitting on the toilet to avoid more messes. We had family friends visiting Houston that were kind enough to meet my friend Veronica halfway between Houston and Austin to pick me up so that my mom would have a shorter drive. Veronica was a life saver. She packed my bags and got me ready for the car ride. We left Veronica's house at 4pm and I arrived at the Tous' hotel in Houston by 8pm. The car ride was extremely uncomfortable. Thankfully, I didn't vomit nor poo my pants. I was grateful the Tous had a suite and they gave me my own bathroom close to a bed. The last time I vomited was at Veronica's house. At this point, I was still shitting every few hours, but I hadn't had a mess since Veronica's house.
At 3am, mom and Kim arrived at the hotel. I put on the depends my mom brought as well as some comfy clothes. We thanked the Tous and left. While walking out of the hotel I could smell the staff cooking the continental breakfast, which made me dry heave and gag once I got outside. I slept in the car the best I could even though bumpy roads made my stomach uneasy. We stopped at most of the rest stops along I-10 East (when the GPS said I-10 East, I swear she was saying "I titties."). Mom and Kim alternated driving and resting. We made a pit stop at the Russo's, our friends in Alabama. We got there around 11:30am. They fed me crackers and ginger ale. I showered and took bath, which I followed with a two hour nap. It was nice to finally see them after 20 years. I want to visit them again when I'm healthy because they are so much fun! We left the Russo's around 4pm.
After leaving the Russo's, we went through a Chick-fil-a drive-thru. We pulled over in a Bed Bath & Beyond parking lot to eat. I took two bites of soup and then I shit myself in the backseat of the car. Thankfully, the adult diaper did its job and contained the mess. Mom went in with me to BB&B to help me clean up my mess and put on a clean diaper. My mom is a trooper! Once that was cleaned up we hit the road because I gave up on eating anything until I got home. Mom and Kim drove through the night making a few pit stops for me before we finally made it home early morning on Tuesday, December 30th.
I'm so very thankful to everyone that helped to get me home and everyone that took care of me when I struggled to care for myself. I'm grateful for all my friends that prayed for me. I'm crying just thinking about how much I am loved and cared for. Although I grieve for my independence during times like this, time has proven that I will get back up and find it again.
I lost 18 pounds during this whole ordeal. I dropped to 132lbs and I seem to be stuck there. When I look at my naked body in the mirror I see an extremely thin and toned physique that most women would envy. However, I feel very weak. I want to regain my strength and weight because this body image to me is one of illness, not health. While I'm stuck listening to how lucky I am that I can lose weight so easily and listening to everyone's new year's resolution to lose weight I am secretly fuming inside.
Once I began vomiting in the early morning on Saturday, December 27th my stomach kept telling me I had to poop every hour, but I could not find relief. I sat on the toilet and vomited in the trash can. That's how I spent most of the day on Saturday when I wasn't lying in bed with a heat pad on my belly. Veronica convinced me to call my parents and tell them what was going on. I didn't want to freak them out, so I tried to down play how horrible I really felt. My mom immediately offered to drive to come pick me up, but I thought I could wait it out and be better by my flight Monday morning. I was wrong!
Saturday night came around and the vomiting had stopped, but I still couldn't poop. I decided to take three pills of Veronica's mom's laxatives in hopes that my belly could find some relief. Sunday morning around 7am I began vomiting again. At this point, I hadn't eaten anything since Friday night, so it was just liquid coming up. I didn't sleep for more than an hour at a time before my body was waking me up because it thought I had to go to the bathroom, but I couldn't get anything out. Around 9am on Sunday I was finally able to poop. At first, beautiful turds filled the toilet; however, each time I went running to the bathroom my bowel movements became looser and looser until I could no longer control them. I pooped my pants twice because I couldn't make it to the bathroom fast enough. I wasn't even embarrassed. Just disappointed with my body. I called my parents at 11:45am Texas time to ask my mom to come get me because I knew I couldn't fly on a plane while having uncontrollable diarrhea and vomiting my brains out.
My mom and Kim left to come get me and I tried to gain some control of my pipes. I spent most of the day sitting on the toilet to avoid more messes. We had family friends visiting Houston that were kind enough to meet my friend Veronica halfway between Houston and Austin to pick me up so that my mom would have a shorter drive. Veronica was a life saver. She packed my bags and got me ready for the car ride. We left Veronica's house at 4pm and I arrived at the Tous' hotel in Houston by 8pm. The car ride was extremely uncomfortable. Thankfully, I didn't vomit nor poo my pants. I was grateful the Tous had a suite and they gave me my own bathroom close to a bed. The last time I vomited was at Veronica's house. At this point, I was still shitting every few hours, but I hadn't had a mess since Veronica's house.
At 3am, mom and Kim arrived at the hotel. I put on the depends my mom brought as well as some comfy clothes. We thanked the Tous and left. While walking out of the hotel I could smell the staff cooking the continental breakfast, which made me dry heave and gag once I got outside. I slept in the car the best I could even though bumpy roads made my stomach uneasy. We stopped at most of the rest stops along I-10 East (when the GPS said I-10 East, I swear she was saying "I titties."). Mom and Kim alternated driving and resting. We made a pit stop at the Russo's, our friends in Alabama. We got there around 11:30am. They fed me crackers and ginger ale. I showered and took bath, which I followed with a two hour nap. It was nice to finally see them after 20 years. I want to visit them again when I'm healthy because they are so much fun! We left the Russo's around 4pm.
After leaving the Russo's, we went through a Chick-fil-a drive-thru. We pulled over in a Bed Bath & Beyond parking lot to eat. I took two bites of soup and then I shit myself in the backseat of the car. Thankfully, the adult diaper did its job and contained the mess. Mom went in with me to BB&B to help me clean up my mess and put on a clean diaper. My mom is a trooper! Once that was cleaned up we hit the road because I gave up on eating anything until I got home. Mom and Kim drove through the night making a few pit stops for me before we finally made it home early morning on Tuesday, December 30th.
I'm so very thankful to everyone that helped to get me home and everyone that took care of me when I struggled to care for myself. I'm grateful for all my friends that prayed for me. I'm crying just thinking about how much I am loved and cared for. Although I grieve for my independence during times like this, time has proven that I will get back up and find it again.
I lost 18 pounds during this whole ordeal. I dropped to 132lbs and I seem to be stuck there. When I look at my naked body in the mirror I see an extremely thin and toned physique that most women would envy. However, I feel very weak. I want to regain my strength and weight because this body image to me is one of illness, not health. While I'm stuck listening to how lucky I am that I can lose weight so easily and listening to everyone's new year's resolution to lose weight I am secretly fuming inside.
Saturday, November 15, 2014
Six Hour Nap
Immediately after dinner on Thursday night, I got a sharp, stabbing pain in my stomach. I was hopeful that I'd be able to poop the pain away. However, none of the nine bowel movements I had during the twelve hours following dinner settled the pain. Pain and bathroom trips interrupted my sleep, but I still went to work Friday morning. It was obvious I was suffering. At work, we have a project we have to finish early next week, so I wanted to complete a few stacks of files on my desk before leaving early to deal with the pain that was continuing to torment me. I went home at lunchtime and dealt with the pain by taking a six hour nap.
By the time I woke up, it was dinner time. I ate some soup and that was the first thing I'd eaten all day. The soup triggered my bowels again. In two days, I've lost about 6 lbs. I'm down to 144, which is on the opposite side of 150 than I want to be at. I'm sure most of it is water weight because I know I'm dehydrated. Today, I'm sore and I feel okay, but I haven't eaten anything yet.
By the time I woke up, it was dinner time. I ate some soup and that was the first thing I'd eaten all day. The soup triggered my bowels again. In two days, I've lost about 6 lbs. I'm down to 144, which is on the opposite side of 150 than I want to be at. I'm sure most of it is water weight because I know I'm dehydrated. Today, I'm sore and I feel okay, but I haven't eaten anything yet.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)